This is an ordinary bicycle with what looks like a large mobile-phone battery strapped to the frame It also differs

This is an ordinary bicycle with what looks like a large mobile-phone battery strapped to the frame It also differs from a normal bike in that it costs £869. Electric bicycles are apparently very popular in China, where you can go as fast you like on them. In Britain, your battery can only legally assist you up to a speed of 15mph. I discover this as I hit 25mph before attempting a hill, only to realise that my battery has cut out.1pm Arrive at Canary Wharf and do a few extra laps With this bike, you do not really feel hills or headwinds. Not realising that you are power-assisted, passers-by are forced to assume that you are incredibly fit.1.15pm Am 15 minutes overdue for a 10-minute manicure In nail-bar terms, I am terribly late.

As the manager of Nails Inc, Claudia Robertson, juggles her appointments, I notice a photo on the wall of a woman jamming her zebra-print nail into a man’s mouth. Am not convinced of the eroticism of this gesture, but make mental note just in case I get lucky at speed dating.1.30pm My manicurist, Banny Ng, is available and I present my nails for inspection “You really need the 30-minute treatment,” Banny tells me. “The 10-minute treatment is designed for people who have a manicure regularly.” I quickly discover that you can’t rush a good nail Claudia suggests that I go for a deep red varnish “Come over to the dark side,” she says encouragingly Banny is not so sure, suggesting something lighter. I have three nails painted different colours so that I can see what I like.1.45pm Make decision on nail colour.2pm Leave nail bar with strict instructions to touch nothing for 15 minutes. However, I am behind schedule and decide to risk it with the bike.2.15pm Cycling was not a good idea.

I arrive back at the office with five good nails (on the left hand) and five smudged ones (on the right, owing to a bit of heavy braking). But I have no time to worry about this as I am due for a two-hour lesson in the art of drawing. Turning on my Yes, You Can Draw! video, I am immediately told by my on-screen instructor, Nancy Margulies, to turn it off again First I have to complete my pre-instruction drawing. When I switch the video back on, Nancy tells me that she is going to take this drawing and “make it look like it was drawn by an artist – the artist within you!” Although inspired, I’m a little upset that she has assumed that my drawing is absolute crap.4.15pm Have completed my first sketch under Nancy’s tuition The key, I have learnt, is to imagine that you can draw And not to get bogged down by things you can’t do “I never spend time on ears!” Nancy tells us Changing her outfits a lot also seems to help Nancy. Clutching my efforts, I head over to The Independent’s arts desk for some informed criticism. My pre-instruction drawing is praised for its “untrained gaiety” (so there, Nancy). And, apparently, my second attempt has been heavily influenced by the work of Euan Uglow.