Unfortunately the moat does not run very swiftly and extraordinarily flows along the whole length of their garden – it must

Unfortunately, the moat does not run very swiftly and, extraordinarily, flows along the whole length of their garden – it must be pretty overpowering in hot weather.”I also received a letter from Sylvia Coigley, a charming, willowy octogenarian. Sally Hotson wrote from Forres in Scotland that her mother was with the Land Army during the Second World War and was billeted near Leominster. Having come from the indoor-loo belt of the Home Counties, she was horrified to find widespread reliance on the outdoor privy. Apparently, the local farm had a four-holer, which the farmer and his wife always visited together.
Sally has most of her mother’s wartime letters home, and one of them reveals her appalled fascination with this farm privy: “It’s a wooden building at the side of the garden which is separated from a field by a hedge and is also on a much higher level, so that there is a sheer drop from the garden to the field.”A moat runs along the field by the hedge, and the building juts out over it in some way. My item a fortnight ago about Herefordshire privies has flushed a remarkable number of privy stories out of the closet.

Plus, there simply isn’t enough chiffon in the world to make her frocks true to life in every loving detail.d.ross independent.co.uk. I even frightened small children.Yours, in true thimble-hood, Deborah RossPS Should you receive a similar request from a Mrs E Rantzen, follow it up at your peril as she’s gone bonkers since appearing on Strictly Come Dancing. Includes tellingly reproduced kitchen cupboard full of tins of golden syrup with lids half-cocked.”Act now and see her in person! Only $654 a month for generations to come!”Lastly, Frank, I know you’re scrupulous about “accurate in every detail”, but might we just porcelain over the cellulite in this instance? Also, I refuse to be dressed in a shorts-style swimsuit as I bought one last year and you’ve never seen such an almighty and non-dainty explosion in the thigh area. No amount of acrylic spared.”Comes lying on an incredibly lifelike stained Ikea sofa with fag burns.”Fantastically true to life, with finger poised above peanut-butter jar and feet in odd socks. The club is now unlikely to bring pleasure to generations to come, but then, it rarely seemed to bring pleasure to the current one. I am known, here, largely for eating peanut butter straight from the jar, leaving Marmite smears in the butter, never putting the tops back on things properly, and mercilessly tormenting my partner and son about Wrexham FC, their football team, which looks as if it’s going down the tube. demanding the right to give teenage girls compulsory contraceptive injections? What, they are already? There you are then.simoncarr75 hotmail
More from Simon Carr.

The cheerleaders in Washington who claimed yesterday that the arrival of Condoleezza Rice at the US State Department would make no difference may be right in terms of US foreign policy. In terms of the impact of her appointment on Europe, their reassurance could not be more wrong. We were able to do that largely because of the face of genial moderation presented by Colin Powell, the Secretary of State Mr Powell spoke in language and concepts that were familiar. In manner, he was debonair, cosmopolitan, a man of the world. You could, as is said, take him anywhere.Which is exactly what Mr Bush did.

Whenever it was in his interests to project a kinder, gentler, more reasonable America, he produced Colin Powell. He used him during his first presidential campaign to exemplify his commitment to diversity, the meritocratic approach and “compassionate conservatism”. Mr Powell’s military credentials as a much-decorated soldier and chairman of the joint chiefs of staff during the 1991 Gulf War helped fill a glaring blank in Mr Bush’s CV: his dubious military service.At the State Department, Mr Powell’s appointment was hugely popular. Upbeat, reliable and disciplined in the way of a retired military man, he initially brought a sense of optimism and stability to a ship that in Madeleine Albright’s last months had started to leak and list Abroad, there were sighs of relief.

We persuaded ourselves that George Bush must have a softer, more sophisticated side to him if he had chosen Colin Powell to manage “abroad”. Mr Powell may even have harboured such hopes himself.This was wishful thinking. It is now hard to escape the conclusion that Mr Bush cynically exploited Mr Powell’s good offices, while progressively side-lining him from the decisions that mattered – and that Mr Powell allowed himself to be manipulated. Whatever the moment at which their ways parted, however, the nadir for Mr Powell must surely be the day when he appeared at the United Nations as the front man for the Pentagon to present the administration’s case for the Iraq war. His task was to demonstrate, using CIA satellite pictures and other intelligence data, that Iraq was in breach of the crucial Security Council resolution, 1441. He was chosen over the US ambassador to the UN and the Defence Secretary because he was trusted around the world.When it transpired that Iraq had no banned weapons after all, Mr Powell admitted that the information he had presented had been erroneous; he had merely passed on what he had been told.